March
24
Come on! You know it feels good to say it! 
Sometimes you are just over it, right? Sometimes you have to say enough is enough. Well that is what this is all about. Giving yourself permission to say f*ck it!
Everyone has expectations of you. Your job, family, friends, strangers, society, friend’s of friends, dates, dry cleaner…
The pressure to be everything to everyone can be way too much for any one of us. There is a point and time when we realize we need to walk away. We have to get back to a place to be at our best and not what everyone else wants or needs.
We tolerate so much and you have to give yourself the permission to say NO MORE!
How do you know when to say it? You know.
I know you do but you push yourself anyway. Sometimes afterwards you feel so gulity or so bitter or used. Sometimes after or even during you lash out at others, become frustrated and annoyed.
These are all signs you pushed yourself too far. You once again gave in and it is time for you to step away.
Remembering when to give your permission to say enough is enough saves you from getting to those points above. Instead, you always allow yourself to be at your best. To use your strengths and to put yourself first.
People will survive without you. They really will!
You won’t survive without yourself. Is it worth giving yourself up to everyone else to make them happy? What about your happiness?
I think you are ready. Ready to say FUCK IT!
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B-girl
on 24 Mar 2010 at 1:54 pm #
*gasp* Oh Michael!…I was right in the middle of a class when I saw the subject line of your post flash up on my email notifier…OMG…I was taking a sip of Coke zero, and I have to tell you, it hurts like h*ll when it comes out of your nose!!! I laughed so hard…
My cheeks also turned very red, because I am a G-O-O-D girl who does not say things like F*CK it! Ever. Well, I did one time…and I almost gave my husband a heart attack (he DOES feel free to express himself with that word!)
With that being said, I have to tell you, sometimes I think it would feel really good to let loose like that. Maybe I’ll give it a try…
Thanks for being so…well…YOU!!!!! You ROCK!!!
~Brandi
Joseph
on 24 Mar 2010 at 2:32 pm #
You must be psychic…every time I feel really down or fed up with things, you pop up these amazing posts that reach into the core of my issues. Right now I’m at the point where I’m scared I can’t find myself. I always try to please everybody else and I’ve lost myself along the way. I’m not even sure if what I’m feeling is actually my own personal property or it’s just an induced state. I want to find who I am. But I’m also afraid. What will happen when I say F*UCK IT, I’ve had it ?!? I was never the one to talk back. When I expressed a desire, it was accepted, only to be questioned afterwards. What do I do? I am truly lonely without myself!
Thekla Richter
on 24 Mar 2010 at 2:55 pm #
Right on Michael!
Claudine Turner
on 25 Mar 2010 at 7:47 am #
Michael, thank you so much!!! I’ve been debating whether or not to say FUCK IT in a certain situation and you’ve nailed all my reasons right on the head: it’s all about my obligations to external forces. So … FUCK IT! I’m going to get back to what ignites my passion and to hell with everything else. Thank you, Michael, for the encouragement to DO ME!
Michael
on 25 Mar 2010 at 11:45 am #
I am so glad to hear you all are really enjoying this post. It is all about giving yourself permission to be you and be happy!
I should add a disclaimer that you do not actually have to say the phrase out to other people.
It is more of something you say in your head. 
cannotstatemynamethistime...
on 27 Mar 2010 at 4:03 am #
Following your advice, I ordered “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz. I’ve just received it and will read it tomorrow during a four hour flight.
I am just looking at the cover:
“Don’t Take Anything Personally: Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.”
Sounds great!
…
However…
…yesterday there was this 7 hours meeting of 7 senior managers (= 49 hours) of a medium sized company in a big town somewhere on this globe. The senior managers were given the task to evaluate the performance of about 30 lower management staff. It was a great, efficient meeting with valuable contributions from everyone. All were proud of the result at the end of the day.
The next day, I learned that the boss had some better opinions and overruled the ratings of the 7-membered group.
Well, I might not take this personally, if this boss would not ALWAYS do things like this, constantly demonstarting his lack of leadership skills.
Tell me, HOW THE F*CK CAN I POSSIBLY NOT TAKE THESE THINGS PERSONALLY?
ARRGGHHHHH!
Michael Moniz
on 27 Mar 2010 at 7:03 am #
I have an easy answer for that which is coming up in the letters.
Here is my hint. “what goes around, comes around.” It always does. Working with leaders I have always said to them that they all have an expiration date. There will be time where they need to move on or they will be moved by the company.
The only way to keep this from happening is to develop your skills and stay fresh as well as empower others to lead as well.
Change does not happen overnight but it does happen. Give it time…
Gerrit
on 28 Mar 2010 at 8:08 am #
Hey Michael,
I really need to thank you for the book recommendation “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz. I read half of it on my flight to Shanghai today, and I am very impressed.
Looking at the first agreement (be impeccable with your word), I have realized that with my post yesterday I have “spread poison”, and thus I ask you to delete my entry.
Apart from that, I realized that no matter what other people say or think, the managers I referred to in the example yesterday did a great job. And even if somebody else later disagreed with it, the work had its value.
Apparently I am proceeding, taking one step at the time.
Enjoy Life!
G.
Nicole
on 29 Mar 2010 at 1:39 pm #
I love this article. I agree 100% about everyone having expectations of you. It can really be draining after a while. I’ve been thinking and feeling this a lot recently. Both work and family have been a sore spot for me in the last few years. As far as family is concerned I recently started saying no and I did feel a little guilt about it, but at the end of the day I realize it’s time to start thinking about my needs above others. The same goes for work. Although it pays the bills I still hate the fact that people in the workplace have so many expectations of what people should be and what they should be doing. God forbid you don’t live up to people’s expectations at work!! I’m going to be 40 years old next week and I am so ready to say F*** it! I’m in transition now and it feels good. Part of my transition has been to register for courses at ICA. And by the way Michael I enjoy your classes!