What was my coming out story? Well it really wasn’t much of a story at all.

I sat my mom down and told her I had something bad to tell her. She said, “Yes.” and I told her I was gay. She asked, “And?”. I said that is it. She said that is not bad at all and she loves me no matter what. Then she said we had to tell my dad. She screamed to my father watching TV, “Dad. Michael is gay,” and my dad responded back, “When are you bringing a boyfriend home.” That is my story.

I know I am lucky to have such supportive family and it worked out for me. I knew from a very young age I was gay but I was taught (a lot through school) that being gay was wrong and a bad thing. It took me a long time to learn to accept who I was and allow myself the right to just be me.

I was working at Red Lobster as server when this happened. There was always jokes about me being gay but I was used to through school as well. It wasn’t until my friend Debbie said to me one late night, “Michael you are gay. Just say it. There is nothing wrong with it. The fater you admit, the faster you can have sex with a boy.” Sure she was a little drunk but it pushed me to think. She ended by saying, “Aren’t you tired of not being yourself?”

I was tired. I was tired of not being me. I was tired of trying to fit in. I was tired of everyone making me feel bad for who I was. It was time to come out.

I get asked a lot about when to come out and my experience makes me feel this way. There comes a time in your life when you are just tired of not being yourself. You are over worrying about everyone else’s reactions in life that it causes you not to be who you are, say what you want to say and do the things you want to do.

When this time comes, you are are so tired from not being yourself it is a huge relief to free yourself and truly just be who you are.

You feel free, happy, complete and able to finally live your life. You no longer have doubts, fear, and pressure keeping you from you. You know it is not easy but being free just is more important.

You take a deep breathe and understand this is all about timing and your process. This is not about anyone else but YOU. When you feel it is right and you are ready, you will do it. Maybe tomorrow, maybe a few months, maybe a few years. Who knows. But it is all up to you.

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