Today is my sister Vicky’s birthday. As you know there is a age difference between my sisters and brother and me. My sister Vicky was 17 when I was born so I was almost like her child. We spent a lot of time together as I was growing up and we were even roommates for a long period of time. 

I am thankful for a great sister like Vicky because she put up with a lot from me. A LOT. 

• She would sing Wilson Phillips Hold On with me in the car and had to deal with me demanding who’s part was who. 
• Being scared of worms, she put up with my fake education classes where I taught her about the inside workings of the worm and wanted her to dissect one like I was doing in 7th grade science class. 
• She babysat me for our parent’s anniversary and then performed “Locomotion” with me with our matching jean jackets as a surprise for our mom and dad. 
• Later she would have to learn how to flip me in our next dance performance to Jane Child, “Don’t Want To Fall In Love.”
• Even later she became the stage hand who supplied the water spray and moving fish in my Little Mermaid performance. 
• She would take me to Pizza Hut every time I receive my free pizza reward from the Book It Program in school. 
• She took me to Sea World as a child and stood by the dolphin pool for many hours until one day I was finally able to reach and touch one. 
• She would order pizza with me and watch Romy and Michelle’s High School Reunion over and over again. We only did this on the nights Buffy was not on. 
• She would play Zelda with me nonstop for 3 days until we beat it. 
• She gave me a wine cork when I was 6 and told me if I kept it by my bed at night, I would safe from nightmares. It worked. 
• She would allow me to come over to her house at night to play on AOL at night. Even when she went to bed at 10pm and had to be up at 6am and I would be up on the computer until 3 in the morning. 
• She put up with the LONG name I created for her because I decided she was going to be a nun in my wonderful pretend world. 
• She listened to my fashion advice when she was getting ready for her dates. 
• She came rushing over to check on me when I hit the parking garage with my car at 16 to make sure I was OK. 
• She pretend to enjoy reacting the beginning of Fame with me when I would push between her and my brother and dance. 
• She would get excited each week to watch Facts of Life with me on Saturday nights. 
• When I moved out with my first boyfriend, it was her who offered for me to live with her so I wouldn’t have to be alone for the first time. 
• She stayed living with me when the relationship was over so I wasn’t alone. 
• When I was younger we would go on Saturdays to the mall to play video games in the arcade. (Remember arcades! How much fun was that!)
• She took me every year to get my picture with Santa and even when we both were way too big to sit on his lap, we would still do it. 
• She has always believed in all of my ideas and has never doubted I would succeed….EVER. 
• She took my first college class, speech, with me so my transition to college was a lot easier not having to do it alone. 
• She came out first and showed me being gay was nothing to be ashamed about and taught me a lot about acceptance. 

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Because I am the baby of my family (by 12 years) I was lucky enough to have an older sister who was pregnant around the same time my mom was pregnant with me. 6 months after I was born I was an uncle and my niece Chrissy was born.

In the beginning, we did not play well together. We would bite, pull hair and end up in tears by the end of any time we were together. I am sure my mom and sister thought we would never get along. In time we did get along, very well, and became best playmates which our parents should have been more afraid about.

We had a lot of fun with our vivid imaginations. We played we were plaque in a mouth of a person. We created our bedrooms into apartments and pretended to be adults, dating a NKOTB and then when we got tired of real life, and we created drama. We had hobo Joe living in our complex and I ended up having a stalker trying to kill me.

Yes, we can up with all these weird and crazy events to play out and we would laugh so hard and just enjoy spending time together.

One of our famous games we played came from one of many sleepovers. We set up my brother’s old tent which still smelled from the attic. It was hot in there but it was a private little area away from it all. We decided to drag in a phone (we didn’t have cordless phones then) and we called the famous 1-800-tampons line to see what questions we could get away with.

We started asking common questions pretending not to know what a period was or how to use the tampons. We then started to create characters to call see how the customer service would respond. I once was a shy girl who didn’t know about the facts of life because my mom had passed away and I was hiding in the closet to ask the questions. During the conversation, my niece would bust in with a loud man voice and scream at me and make whipping sounds and I would hang up.

Of course as an adult now, we know how bad that was but back then, at 12, we thought it was the best thing ever. We never thought we could have had the cops called on us for child abuse.

The last act we put on was I was a southern girl calling about tampons. I happened to be in the barn and my niece was mooing like a cow in the background. The whole plot twist of our joke was that I wasn’t calling about me but for my cow. The woman did not find this funny and my niece and I just screamed a Moo! in the phone and hung up.

By this time we realized they only had a few people working the hot-line and we had spoken to all them several times with all our different scenarios and dramas. When we called back, we happened to get the same lady from before and who said she knew who we were so we just mooed again and hung up. This became the new game.

We would just call and moo and hang up. Of course this whole game had gone on for hours that day, into the next day and even a few days later from each other homes. We didn’t have three way calling back then so I would have to use my sister’s other phone line, while I was on my home phone and had my niece on the other line. I would hold the phones together so we both could hear and then moo.

What we didn’t realize was call tracing was just being developed and they called back. They called back my sister line and left her a message. My sister of course played it for my mom and I was busted. The gig was up. The moo capers had been caught.  The worst part was I had to call my brother in law and tell him what we had been doing so my niece would be punished to.

The next weekend was Easter and the whole family got together for brunch. We did not hear the end of what we did. I think part of the time they were pissed at us but most of the time they were dying with how random, silly and weird my niece and I were.

I will never forget those moments with my niece and how much fun it was. I do not remember the punishment as much as the fun and laughter we shared during our prank calls.

Sometimes I answer telemarketers calls and before they can speak, I moo and hang up. It still makes me laugh.

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I think about you constantly, whether it’s with my mind or my heart. ~Albany Bach Reid

Happy Birthday

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Dictionary.com says: any group of persons closely related by blood, as parents, children, uncles, aunts, and cousins.

This past week I was able to meet Justin’s mother and stepdad for the first time. They also bought his half sister and step sister along. Was I nervous to meet them, no because I already felt they were family. The question was, would they feel the same about me…

And they did.

The moment I meet them I knew this was now a new part of my family. We were able to spend some great times together touring Orlando, going to theme parks and just having fun together sharing stories about each other.

Why did I feel they were family? Because they truly cared about who I was and was interested in my life and getting to know me. They also were open to sharing about their lives and eager to open up with me. They trusted me, they were honest with me, and there was love there.

I can think of all the extended family reunions I went to where my own blood cousins didn’t know anything about me and really didn’t care to learn. They weren’t willing to open to share about themselves and I didn’t feel welcomed. I knew that after the reunion was over, we would go back to our lives and never speak again.

I realized that I have to define what family means to me. I belive family is people who come into your life who make it better with their love, support, friendship and hugs. They truly care about who you are and love you no matter what. You can trust your family and you know they are always there with open arms. My family consists of my parents, my siblings, Justin, my friends and now my new west coast family who I am glad to add.

How do you define your family?

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Once a week I always have dinner with my mom. It is my little habit to keep in touch with my number one fan.

My mom was always there smiling and cheering me on through all my adventures. When I was ten and thought I could be a singer and wrote a song called, “I dyed my hair purple, what did you dye for me?” she supported me and taught me I should go after my dreams no matter what. Of course, I am sure you lost some of hearing having to listen to me trying to sing during those years.

It is so easy to lose touch with your family. By making this regular date with my mom allows me to always spend time each week with her. It gives me the opportunity to share about my new adventures, bounce my ideas off her and receive her honest feedback on what I am doing. My mom helps me, truly be who I am.

My mom asks for one thing from me and that is time. She has always just wanted me to give her some of my time so we can laugh and chat. The greatest thing I get is love. Unconditional love from one of the most purest hearts I know.

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Lately, my stomach has been bothering. When I stress, worry or have anxiety about anything it goes right to my stomach. PLUS I have a fear of throwing up so that adds to my stomach issues.

A long time ago, I had similar problems with my stomach. I was placed on meds to help settle it and it took a few weeks to heal. I am in the same boat right now. I am taking the meds the Dr gave me to help reduce my upset stomach and reduce the current pain.

I take my health for granted A LOT. Now that I am not feeling well I realize how important it is to take care of yourself so you do not get in this situation in the first place. That is why I am making a lot of changes in the health department. I want to make sure to stay well and feel great because being sick SUCKS!

It has been 2 weeks of feeling sick and it is draining to me. Last night I threw myself a pity party because I was so tired of feeling ill. Then I stopped myself and remembered I am quite lucky.

When my sister went through her mastectomy and chemo for her breast cancer I am sure she felt a lot worse than me and she made it through the months to years of recover. I am sure there were many days when she would have loved to feel better and just be over it. I am sure there were many days where she cried herself to sleep because she was so scared. But, I am also sure said told herself to suck it up because she was going to feel better soon and brighter days were ahead.

Well I am sucking it up and knowing I am going to feel like myself before I know it. It only takes time to heal. The most important part is to commit to my health and keep myself from being here again.

This means I need to stop neglecting the body I have and start taking care of it. I need to invest in myself.

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This week I finally saw “Wicked”. I know everyone and their brother has seen it already but it was my turn to see it this week.

I bought tickets in November for my mom and sister as well as Justin as a holiday gift.

I didn’t know what to expect but I really enjoyed it. It is a funny show with quite the message behind the whole story. I do not want to give a lot away but they did a great job of including Wizard of Oz in the story as well as making “Wicked” a modern tale you can relate to.

If you haven’t seen it yet, I do recommend you check it out.

There is a story behind my story as well. My mom is turning 70 next year which means it is not as easy for her to get around. I do not want to say it is her health but more of her belief of not wanting to make people feel inconvenienced.

She walks slower now because she has fallen before and she is careful when walking steps to always hold on the hand rail. I am always encouraging her to go out but she feels better staying home.

Taking her to “Wicked” let me see why she prefers to stay home. When we arrived at the theatre we had to climb tons of steps to only then walk down tons more. No one offered us an elevator or a simple way to get to our seats. When we got to our seats, no one stood up to make it easier to get to our seats. I was having a hard time not falling over people’s feet. When we got a break in the show for 15 minutes, everyone rushed to the stairs to use the restroom. My mom knew she couldn’t make it up the stairs in time to get in line and use the restroom before the show started so she didn’t go.

She doesn’t want to go out to inconvenience people but people are making the world an inconvenience to her. Why wouldn’t anyone notice it was hard for her to walk and offer their help? Why wouldn’t the people stand up to let her get to her seat? Why wasn’t there an easier way to get in the theatre in the first place?

In a culture that idolizes the youth we forget we all are growing older by each day and one day soon, we will have a hard time getting to our seats. Take notice of your actions and try to make it easier for others so when it is your turn, hopefully someone will do the same for you.

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Sibling rivalry is very common among brothers and sisters. I was lucky because I am 12 years younger than my closet sibling in age so I grew up basically like an only child.

Of course, I do have siblings. Two sisters and one brother. They are all in their 40’s, currently, until next year when my oldest sister turns 50. While at my sister’s birthday this past weekend, I started to think back on some of the memories I have from them:

My sister Donna invited me over to spend the night on many occasions. Having older siblings mean I also had an older niece who happened to be my age. We would play games late into the night keeping my sister and my brother in law up. She would always have slices of white bread, from her neighbors, for me because she knew I didn’t like wheat bread.

My sister Vicky and I would play tons of video games together. She was always there to help me with a flat tire or when my car battery died. She was the sibling who showed up at the hospital at 2 in the morning when I was bleeding from my tonsils stitches opening up. It was Vicky who gave me a wine cork when I was a kid and told me it would keep the monsters and nightmares away and I believed it.

My brother Eric had to deal with being the baby of the family and then 12 years later having a new baby brother. He would allow me to play with his Star Wars figures and read his comic books that he kept in pristine condition even though he knew I was careless and most lucky going to ruin them. It was my brother who rushed to my elementary school when my mom had forgotten it was the day we got out an hour early to rescue me and take me home. It was my brother and his friends who played shark with me in the pool until my eyes were red from all the underwater swimming.

I am sure I can come up with many more stories about my siblings including all four of us making a musical video singing MMMBop, the thousands of birthday party board games we played, and our family trips to Sanibel Island.

There are also tons of things my sisters and brothers have done through the years that have hurt my feelings. But, there is one thing I always remember, they are family. The hurt is the price I pay for loving them so much. Only people you truly love can hurt you and in the end it is worth it. The hurt is only a drop in bucket of a lifetime full of laughter, support and love.

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My mom saw this concept on TV and thought it was a great idea so she shared it with me and I am sharing it with you. We spend a lot of time creating To Do Lists about our goals and tasks. I always tell clients and friends to create life lists to get the most out of life, but when do we make a list of the things we don’t need in our lives?That is where the Don’t Do List comes into play. With this list, you are able to remind yourself of the things you commit to not do anymore. You can think of all those bad habits you want to change and when you are ready, you place them on the list and commit to stopping them. Unlike a To Do List, we do not list tons of items and cross them off as we do them. On the Don’t Do List, we place the item on the list when we are truly committed to stopping the habit. Once we feel we have a good handle on stopping it, we go ahead and add the next item we are committed to stop doing.What are some examples of items to add to the list? Stop smoking, stop self doubting, quit judging others, stop neglecting your friends, etc.This list is not meant to be negative but a healthy reminder of the bad habits we commit to change and finally are putting them to rest.

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Today is my Dad’s birthday. Of course we will be celebrating the event with lunch at Red Lobster(his favorite place to eat) with the family.

 My dad is a simple man. He enjoys playing his golf video game, watching Guiding Light and eating food that may not be the best for him. He is quiet but how could he get a word in with my mom and I talking anyway. He has the kindest, loving heart and is truly proud of me which is the best gift I can ask from my dad.

My father worked his whole life until his retirement. He supported the family while my mom was at home with the kids. I never needed or wanted anything. My life as a child was blessed and still as an adult it is very blessed from all the work he did.

My dad can truly be depended on and has always been there to help me with tons of topics that I never understood. He helps me with my flat tires and car problems. He helps me with gardening and taking car of my house. He has always been my hero.

So on this day I wish my Dad a Happy Birthday because without him, I wouldn’t be the man I am today.

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