I am light headed, sweaty, my pulse is racing, and this all came from a flip of the calendar from June to July…

My friend April was given a Greg Plitt calendar as a gag gift during the holidays. We all thought it was funny but as time has moved on the calendar flip has become the highlight of the first day of the month.

April IMed and asked if I wanted to see the flip. I thought it was funny so I came over and we gawked at the next photo, laughed and moved on. Others in the office started to find out about our little game so April started to invite other people over to enjoy in the calendar flip ceremony.

We close the office door, hold hands in anticipation and then FLIP to the next month. We talk about the parts we love, what he is saying in the picture and then we get a very fast flash on the next month to keep us going.

Sure it is just a calendar flip but we make it to be so much more because it is just fun. It makes the day start off full of laughter and we bond together over the next month picture. It is our secret club.

People always ask me how to get a happier life. THIS IS HOW YOU DO IT!

It is not about the calendar but about the small things you add to your life which allow you to smile, laugh and make your day a little better. They are all not going to be a life changing event. They are just present moments which allow your day to be a little better. The more fun and laughter you add, the happier your life will be.

Now we want to know what Ice Men smells like…

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I took the Life List Challenge and here is my current life list. I am sharing this with everyone because you can:

• Support me along the way
• Act as a resource to make items happen
• Hold me accountable
• Share in the celebration

My Life List:

Go to New York City

Go to Australia

Publish a book

Be Debit Free

Have 200K in savings

Work from home

Fly first class

Go on the Sex and the City Tour in NYC

Go on a cruise

Go horse back riding on a beach

Swim with Beluga Whales

Swim in the Living Seas at EPCOT

Eat at the Cinderella Castle

Join the Mile High Club

Swim with manatees

Buy a piece of original art

Swim with Sharks @ Sea World

Be on the Board of a charity or non-profit

Learn to juggle

Learn Sign Language or Spanish or BOTH

Do almost all of the 209 things to do in Orlando

Do almost all of the 101 things to do before you die

So here is my list so far…

Doesn’t mean I won’t add to it as time goes on but here is a start…

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Do you want more our of life? Do you want to create better life experiences? Do you want to create better memories? Do you want to look back on each year and say WOW I did all of that?

Take the Life List Challenge

I have talked a lot about Life Lists a lot on here. A Life List is a list of all the things you would like to achieve in life. You are welcome to add more as you want and take ones off when plans change. It is your life that allows you to keep your life dyanmic.

A Life List is a GIANT To Do list for you. It is so easy for us to be caught up in the day to day of life that we plan to do everything in the future. A future which may not come.

A Life List is a commitment to yourself to achieve these items so you are getting MORE out of life.  Not later but now.

I am taking the Life List Challenge and I want you to join with me!

This weekend I am going to take the time to reedit and complete my current life list. When I am done, I will post it here on Monday for everyone to see. As I complete items on the list, I will post entries so you can see the progress.

I want you to do the same! Take some time this weekend and create your life list. It doesn’t have to be complete as you can edit it or add to it all the time. You just have to begin.

The big part of this challenge is not to just create the list but to commit to starting to cross of the items as we move along. How much fun will this be?

So I am off to start my list, and I hope you join me.

Welcome to the Life List Challenge!

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This week, while talking to my mom, I was told that my dad is going to get a cane to help him walk.

My dad is in his mid 70’s so a cane should not surprise me and he has been in a lot of pain lately and is afraid he will fall. It is great that he wants a cane to help him around. Knowing the fact my dad has worked so hard his whole life it is a great thing he is only needing a cane now.

This information still upsets me.

I do not think anyone wants to see their parent getting older. I know I have always thought of my dad as strong and to see him needing a cane really shocks my perspective of him. I think it is a reality check that your parents will need you to take care of them someday.

Of course then I go to the selfish side and wonder, who will take care of me?

This is a mirror back to me that I am getting older too. I always believed my parents would always be here on this Earth forever. How would I survive without them?

That is when I realize it is all about growing up. We all have to face the fact we are getting older as well. We were born knowing we were headed to death and that is how life is. It is not about all the road blocks, health issues, frustrations that make a difference. It is how we use the time we have right now that truly makes the difference.

You only have the present and you have to enjoy it. My dad is doing this, just now with a cane.

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So many bloggers and friends have been talking about this column written by Regina Brett, a 90-year-old resident of Cleveland, Ohio. In her column, Regina recounts 45 of the most important life lessons. I wanted to share the list with you:

1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ‘In five years, will this matter?’
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.

What are some life lessons you would add to this list?

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Justin came from school the other day and spent a good 2 hours telling me about his day. When he finally took a breathe and let me ask him something, he looked at me weird.

I asked him what was wrong and he said, “I sounded hoarse and a little raspy.” I looked at him with a puzzled look and kept on talking. He again mentioned my voice and I told him it has to be nothing.

But, it wasn’t nothing…

Well Justin was in school, I was living my Broadway Dream. Yes I was starring in my own Broadway show and I had my own singing number to Roxette’s Fading like a Flower.

I had been singing it at least 20 to 30 times that night. I was singing all the way to back row and was giving them my all. I am sure my neighbors were not happy but I was having fun.I was living a dream.

Could I really be on Broadway, maybe but not for singing. Trust me!

This was my way of being silly and letting go of stress. Just having fun and enjoying some time at home. When I was a kid, I had a vivid imagination and played many games like this.

As I got older, I played less and less and worked more and more. I learned that my imagination really helps me in a lot of what I do. Those games were great escapes for me so I could have some time for me, enjoy myself and just let go!

“We do not stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing”

~ Ben Franklin

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I am an open book. I truly mean this. What you see is what you get with me and I am really do not hide any part of my life.

For a long time I struggled with being comfortable with myself. I would seek out other’s advice and opinion on what I should and shouldn’t do.  As time went on, more and more people started giving me more and more advice, criticism, etc and I was buried underneath it all.

I looked at my life and realized it wasn’t me. I lost who I was and was poorly trying to be what everyone else wanted and it was not working. When I started to let it all go, people responded. People responded because I was unique, I was me.

There is a price you pay for being a open book…

I am very trusting and really allow myself to be out there. This means people can take advantage of me or simply hurt me and lose my trust. This doesn’t keep me from being trusting or cause me to close down. These are lessons learned and help me to keep growing and surrounding me with people who support and build me up.

I also had to let go of the ego. Not everyone was going to like me as me. I wouldn’t be able to try to win them over anymore. Besides, no matter how hard I tried, they were never going to like me because I just am not the person they are looking for. I am OK with that. There are many who do and that is now where I focus my energy.

The best part of being an open book is the fact that I am free. I can just be me and not worry about how to act or behave in any situation. I do not have to rethink what I am going to say or how to say something. I do not have to play other people’s games or office politics. I get to just be me.

With all of that said, you can always ask me questions but this post is directly for your questions. You can ask me anything you would like to know in the comments section and I will reply to you there. I want you to get to know me and have answers to the questions that maybe I can help with or share with you.

So go for it! I am an open book. What would you like to know?

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I remember being so excited about Virgin Megastore being built in Downtown Disney. I couldn’t wait for the MEGASTORE to open so I would be able to get any CD or DVD I wanted.

I went there as much as I could once it was opened. The coolest part was that it was open VERY late. Being a night owl, I would call my friend Robert and we would drive the 20 minutes from downtown area to get there and buy the CD I was craving at the moment.

Some of the times we just went for the hell of it. No CD in mind but just wanted to get out and see what we might find. Sometimes we found music and sometimes we found men.

It was Robert and I’s little adventures and it was always a good time.

I remember loving the the wall where you could listen to one of the top CDs before you bought it. There were quite a few times when I would get caught singing or dancing because I was lost in the music. There were many times when I wanted to get caught dancing by someone and set it up.

I also heard a rumor that gay men would have sex with random guys in the bathroom. So Robert and I spend a good 3 hours pretending to be looking for books to see if it was true. Not true at all.

Soon Robert and I’s trips to Virgin started to be less and less. We started dating people and the invention of iTunes really kept us from making the late night trips.

Life happened as well. I became busy and so did Robert. We couldn’t make late night runs when we are going to bed at 9pm.

I had heard the news but it really hit me when I was at Downtown Disney this weekend and saw the sign that Virgin had closed. There was a building where I spent such great times with Robert in, now empty and unused as if the store never exsisted.

I wish Robert and I had made it to the store one more time before it closed but I did not make time for it and now it is just another missed opportunity.

When I look back on life will I remember what I was busy doing instead of going to Virgin for the last time? No. I do not remember now what I was doing.

I want to make sure that life is filled with moments I will never forget. How about you?

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This week in the office they were upgrading the software so most people in the department had down time all week. This wouldn’t be down time for me because it was time to set up some fun activites to keep us laughing and having fun while we waited for the system.

April and I were tasked with planning an activity for Thursday. We needed a game so people could win points as the whole department had been divided into teams. April and I created the “So You Think You Can Dance” Challenge!

It was simple. You came to the event and you received points. If you took the spotlight challenge, you would choose a random dance style and have to dance for 30 seconds to receive your additonal points.

April and I were the hosts and created the funny skits we were going to perform as we read which ever dance style you selected.

Of course everyone did not want to dance and people were complaining about the activity and saying they were not going to do it. April was concerned and I told her not to worry. Everyone feels that way until they see the fun.

When the event started we had a line of people waiting to join in. As the event went on, more and more people joined and more and more people did the spotlight dances. It was all about fun.

After the event ended we were all tired from dancing, laughing and having a good time. I think people are afraid to have fun at work because they will be perceived as being unprofessional or not a hard worker.

I have to disagree because I made a career out of creating fun in workplaces and in people’s lives. We all need this balance in our lives and it really leads to a more productive working environment. There is nothing wrong with laughing out loud at work.

It is Friday and I hope all of you take a moment today, with a co-worker or when you are by yourself to dance a little. Why? Why not? You only live once…

JUST DANCE!

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As most of you know, I have been writing articles for Gay.com for a long time. I just posted a new one about celebrating pride which I told the story of my friend “Randy”.  Check it out here!

I asked “Randy” (I picked this name because when I met him he kept telling me how he thought he looked like Randy Harrison from Queer as Folk. He doesn’t. ) if he would mind if I would share our story. I promised I would leave out his bitchy comments and just tell the sweet story of how we met and why he went to Gay Days in Orlando. He agreed and thought it would be a great story about pride. He has always loved pride events and he still participates in many of them.

It has been many years since I met him and life has moved on a lot since then. The same year I met him it was only months later his father passes away. “Randy” then moved to a bigger city and has been in a LTR for over 4 years. Life goes on…

When the article posted, I told “Randy” check it out! This morning he calls me. He is upset about how many negative comments are written about me and about the story. He doesn’t understand why people would be so mean about a simple story.Why they would say such mean things about his friend they do not even know.

I told him he needs to see past the negative comments to the positive ones. Those are the ones that count. Those are the people the story made a difference to. Those are the people who the article was written for.

When I write these articles, I know I am going to get tons of negative comments. I know the gay community well. It is OK. That is the whole point of these articles. As long as they are talking about it…

The articles are all about getting a conversation stated. Just like this blog, it is about connecting with people I might not have the chance to reach if it wasn’t for this forum. Some of the entries you love, so you do not. It is all about the conversation.

If I let all the negative comments get to me, I would have given up a long time ago. When I was in school, I was bullied and picked on and called a fag. If I let them get to me I would have never come out and never love the life I have now. It is just sad that now the negative comments come from the same community I am apart of but where do you think they learned these bad habits? I am sure they were picked on as well. It is their chance to give it back.

I am not saying it is OK to be negative. I think it is a waste of time and energy but, they have a right to say what they want BUT it doesn’t mean I  listen. There are so many more positive comments on the articles and on my blog anyway. Those are truly what counts. I am not trying to get the world to love me. I just want to make a few people think and mostly laugh.

So as long as they keep talking about the articles and my blog, I will keep writing.

I think “Randy” summed it up best when he quoted Britney Spears…

“Love me, hate me, say what you want about me but all of the boys and all of the girls…”

PS. “Randy” I think I might have extended your fame to a whole 2 minutes with this. ENJOY IT!

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